Inspiration for the Blog

        Because life takes its turns, I have decided to create this blog to keep my mind off of the negative and focus on the positive. There have been many controversial topics in society that I have had opinions on so I decided to let my voice heard. Throughout my life, I have never had a true first love-something that I deeply care about passionately. There has never been that first love relationship or that first love hobby. Hopefully, through this Blog, I will find MyFirstLove.

Smokeful Vision

If I only start smoking earlier. I would see all this coming.
The tobacco and Mary Jane would of surely told me everything
about him through deep thought preventing me
from being right now currently distraught in you,
which I thought that I wanted.
What a waste of time..
I could of bought a dime bag everyday
and that wouldn’t have compared to how much money and time I spent on you.
Man that dime everyday would have made my brain clear from thinking of you.
It would have been cheaper than what I spent on you
and it wouldn’t have me feeling at the end teary and blue.
Its like you was my nicotine and I was really smoking.
I kept wanting you even though I knew you were bad for me.
I blame it on the addiction.
I was addicted to wanting to have a relationship
and I thought you would bring joy out of me
that I wasn’t seeing or feeling lately.
Addiction is a......you know what they say
but now that I’m going through withdrawal.
I see all your real flaws and I see your lies and I see it all.
You didn’t really care about me.
You didn’t love me.
You didn’t even like me.
You knew how I felt about you,
but it seems like I was just something for you to do.
I saw the signs of continuing to be addicted as causing potential harm,
but I kept continuing.
I saw your ex clothes still hanging perfectly creased in the closet and not in a bag.
I saw her stuff still on your computer stand.
I saw her phone calls when you were around me,
but I was just so blinded in what I thought was happening between you and me.
I saw us not being equally yoked and you going from 0 to 180 and at the end you playing me. You not appreciating me and wanting to use me for everything
and you bringing so much hurt to me.
Your advertisements weren’t much appealing
It was just the lifestyle I was feeling.
But now since I’m no longer addicted to this nicotine.
I can start recovery and be ready for the future of what society will bring.
I quit smoking for myself because I care about myself, my health and I want to live a happy life and I know when I walk away
I’m going to be happy,
but your just going to decrease in sales
and wish you still had me.